Right now, I have two big roadblocks. And one of them happens to be the big nasty monster called selfishness.
I think we all struggle with selfishness to some degree. But, recently, I've realized how selfish I have become. Somewhere along the way, I decided that I deserve to get what I want. And it is ok for me to be angry or pout-y or sad when I don't get my way. And, of course, I know that's 100% not right. That is a sinful area in my life that needs work.
But I sort of wonder how I got this way. My parents certainly didn't stand for that sort of thing when I was growing up. But, I've been out of their "control" for almost six years now. And most days, there's no one there telling me to check my attitude or to keep me in line. Thomas does a pretty great job of treating me like a princess, but that doesn't mean that it's ok for me to act like everyone else's interests are beneath mine.
The main area I see this in my life is with my husband. He would bend over backwards or fly to the moon to make me happy. And I've started to take advantage of that. But I want to change. I want to be better.
I feel like my main purpose right now is to be a godly, submissive, and supportive wife to my husband. And I can't do that if I'm busy ordering him around to obey my every whim. I truly want to be the wife and the home he just can't wait to come back to each evening. And the one he can barely stand leaving in the morning.
So the verse I read this week to remind me that it's not about me is a very well known one, but it certainly needed repeating for me. It's Philippians 2:3 (NIV).
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